Celebrating NOT voting today.

Earlier I asked the Q “what did you do today for you and what did you do for others?”

For me: I did a lot of things for me, as is my usual. Self care is my thing. Spent time in the backyard, had the most magical bath, was gentle with myself as I processed all the voting things (see below), relaxed, played, ate all the fruit and veggies, did the immune boosting things.

For others: I didn’t vote in the IL primary.

And that came with a whirlwind of emotions. 

I came to the realization last night that I wouldn’t be voting

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I’ve had a dry cough and shortness of breath for a week now. Some background: My doctor sent me to the ER to get my symptoms checked several days ago. I didn’t qualify for CV testing in IL as I have not traveled outside the country and wasn’t known to be in close proximity to someone that tested positive. After a negative flu test and pneumonia check, I was diagnosed with a lower respiratory infection and asthmatic episode. I was given a breathing treatment, prescribed prednisone and an inhaler and sent home. Over the last couple days noticing symptoms were still the same (no improvement or decline), without being tested I had to just assume that I could possibly have coronavirus. My only symptoms are dry cough and shortness of breath. I generally feel fine, great even. I honestly do not feel sick. Just these 2 symptoms aren’t budging. 

The reason that I haven’t said anything to most people, is that I really don’t want attention around it. I would honestly, appreciate if I am able to share this here now to just get it out. And not recieve opinions or feedback on that part of it. Thank you for understanding and respecting my boundary. 

Again, I generally feel healthy and definitely happy and I am having this extraordinary lightworker rising up moment. This is the part I truly want to focus on. I feel myself growing and expanding. I’m seeing it in others too. It’s lighting me the f up.

So back to the election story.. Last night I realized that because of my symptoms I wouldn't be voting. I was processing the feelings of missing an election for the first time in 22 years. (Voting is incredibly important to me. I’ve always had a passion for it. Did you know I majored in Political Science?)

As I was coming to terms with this and sharing with some sisters, I felt energy swirling around that maybe there was another way to cast my vote. I connected with my freaking amazing State Representative Anne Stave-Murray. I found out the mail in absentee ballots just needed to be postmarked today. But how could I get a ballot?

I ended up having an amazing conversation with the coolest election commissioner after my amazing freaking state representative called personally on my behalf. After our chat, it became clear that the possibilities running through my head of a mail in or curbside situation could still compromise others. My ethical and moral responsibility outweighs my right and passion for voting.

Ultimately I didn’t vote today bc I freaking love you all and if there is even the tiniest possibility I am a carrier, well then I gotta keep my physical distance, So, I’m officially quarantined af over here. 

Please, if you have the tiniest of anything going on too, please please do the same. The temporary bit of discomfort it causes you to post up is nothing compared to the impact not doing so can have.

I’m learning a lot through the experience and feeling proud of myself for how I am processing. Not just missing my first election, but also what’s going on within and around me. 

I feel vulnerable and I also feel really strong. This mirrors all of our experience right now. 

We are all vulnerable. No one is immune to coronavirus or being impacted in some way by what’s going on in the world. But we are also all so freaking strong. Look at all the people answering the call to rise up. It is beyond beautiful. 

We may be physically separating, but socially we are coming together. Never has there been something that is impacting the whole planet like this. It’s incredible. And the way mother earth is getting a much needed break from us is absolutely poetic. 

I continue to see the light everywhere I look and that includes within you. 

We are all going to have some things to move through with this. We will all be challenged. There will be moments threatening to take us down - whether it’s our body or our mind or our empath abilities. However, you will continually be given the chance and choice to rise up and I believe fully in your ability to do so. 

I love you. I love you. I love you.